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Open your eyes, O Indian!

My dear Indians, it pains me to see our country today. While we embrace foreign culture, trying our best to be accepted by the white race, the West in turn has been looking towards us. The West has realized that there is truth and wisdom in the Indian ways.

They have adopted our age old practices like yoga, vipasana and Gita. We copy their burgers and junk food.

Indians knew everything before the West even figured out North and South. We split the atom, we had nuclear missiles. What's that? How did such an advanced civilization meet its death and was so easily enslaved by foreigners, you ask? Never mind that.

My point is, these days, you see in the West that men are marrying women less than half their age. In India (Bharat?), we had this too. It was called child marriage. While we have foolishly abolished this system, the West has adopted it.

That's why the new government's commitment to restore our ancient culture while simultaneously kissing every foreign big businesses, pleading them to come invest in our country, is going to ensure that we will once again become the leaders in the world.

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Note: this is my attempt to satirize the over enthusiastic and somewhat unwise attempts by the Hindu right in the country to impose Vedic "ideology" onto the entire country (including atheists and those belonging to other religions). Yes, I agree we need to preserve our culture (Indian culture, not Hindu culture. There's a difference). But it's foolish of anyone to believe that if we follow the ways of people who lived thousands  of years ago, the whole country will somehow magically become prosperous.

It has also become a fad to blame Britishers and Muslim invaders for the decadence of Indian culture and people. Yes, Britishers looted us and Muslim kings kept all the wealth to themselves, like the Hindu kings did too (a lower caste person was miserable under Muslim and Hindu kings and British sahebs. The people who are upset with the Muslim kings are the ruling classes cuz their power was taken away from them). The bone of contention here is mot that these foreigners did not do anything for the common people, but that they brought with them and were able to propagate new religions.

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